News flash from Washington, DC--December 15, 2009
The big news from Washington will be revealed wednesday morning by Senator Harry Reid that the Senate has reached an agreement on a comprehensive healthcare bill. Final passage of the bill will be formalized on a vote taken in the afternoon when 60 Democrat and Independent Senators vote yes on the proposed legislation. PMNS has learned that three key senators have agreed to vote for the bill. The three Senators and what they will receive for voting for the bill are as follows:
1) Blanche Lincoln, D-AR; The state of Arkansas will receive $100 million towards the building of the 'Blanche Lincoln Freedom and Prosperity Library'. Each individual currently unemployed in the state will receive an additional 416 weeks of unemployment benefits and will not be subject to the new healthcare legislation.
2) Ben Nelson, D-NE; All corn farmers in Nebraska will be given $25 million to go towards their childrens college education. If a child does not qualify to go to college, then the allowance will go towards the funding of the childs pig farm. All pork products sold will be offered at 50% about market value. An additional $101 million will go to the 'Benjamin Nelson Annual Pig Roast' to attract only the very best live entertainment during the two week fair. Anyone signing up to work the pig roast will not be subject to the new healthcare legislation.
3) Joseph Lieberman, I-CT; All Connecticut highways will be completely repaved and all toll booths will be removed for 5 years. Mohegan Sun & Foxwoods casinos will be exempt from state and federal taxes and their employess will not be subject to the new healthcare legislation. An additional $102 million will go to the 'Joseph Lieberman handshake for Peace' campaign.
These compromises, along with several other previously agreed to compromises, will bring the healthcare legislation to a speedy conclusion. The House of Representatives has voiced its approval when Congressman John Dingell said, in his usual deliberate manner, "this is great news for the American people who can finally look to their government to provide for them a fair, just and reasonable insurance coverage and healthcare." Dingell also intimated that an additional $103 billion for Government Motors & Chrysler wouldn't hurt. Additionally, all unemployed auto workers will get 25 years of unemployment benefits.(They will also NOT be subject to the new healthcare legislation)
Soon, Americans can sing that long forgotten tune first sung out during the dark days of the great depression--Happy days are here again!!!
This newsclip provided by the Pete Morin News Service